Five Key Behaviors of Excellent Communicators

Over the last month, I’ve been sharing they core habits of good communicators based on the Honestly Speaking book. These are habits — not just one-and-done tactics you try — that effective communicators develop, hone, and deploy. This week is the penultimate batch.

Good communicators work at it, and some of being good at communicating is honing your skills, while other parts are more about working on yourself.

Find more of these habits and other tools to help you communicate better in Honestly Speaking: How the Way We Communicate Transforms Leadership, Love, and Life available now wherever books are sold.

1. They are willing to have — and are good at having — difficult conversations. We live in a culture of deflection and avoidance. Passive-aggressive behavior is the enemy of healthy communication. Great communicators are willing to have honest conversations, even when it’s hard, and they do so by making sure the other person understands their motivations and intentions.
2. They show how they feel instead of just telling. “Show, don’t tell” is one of the first rules of writing for a reason. Instead of just telling people you’re upset, showing them why with examples is much more effective.
3. They know their audience. Great communicators take the time to know who they’re speaking to and how they will best understand information.
4. They apologize genuinely when they’ve done something wrong. “I’m sorry, but” is not what I’m referring to. A genuine apology involves reflection and ownership. The best communicators do this and also reap the benefit of stopping a story before it spins out of control in the mind of another person (or group of people).
5. They communicate enthusiasm and passion. Everyone is operating with their own ideals and priorities. You should care the most about what impacts you, and if you’re sharing something that’s really exciting or important to you that you think the audience might not know about, don’t miss an opportunity to share your enthusiasm and passion. If you’re not excited about what you’re saying, you can’t expect anyone else to be.

Find the rest of these habits and other tools to help you communicate better in Honestly Speaking: How the Way We Communicate Transforms Leadership, Love, and Life available now wherever books are sold.